I really dislike summer colds. In the winter it's expected to have a scratchy throat and cough. In the summer it's just plain miserable.
I have a date tonight. Yes Petey, I actually said yes. BUT I feel horrible, disgusting is more like it. My head feels like it weighs twenty pounds, my nose is stuffed up, my eyes are glassy, and I sound like a frog.
I don't want to cancel, but I feel sooooooooo unattractive. I know he's going to be disappointed, but I can't even hear clearly. I can see myself saying "What?" the whole date.
I haven't given this guy a name yet. It's the one who's 10 years younger than I am. The name that keeps popping into my head is Mr. Baby, but I just can't call him that. OH! How about Mr. B? Yup, that's his name.
Now, onto the guy I spoke to last night. The one who's 11 years older than I am, and wants to come to Oz to see me next week. I need a name for him too. Can't think of one. Give me some time. My brain is moving slower with this head cold.
I like these men, and then there's the third one who's a musician. Yup, a musician. Y'all know how I feel about them. But the third man isn't going to work. Too many differences... although, that doesn't mean that we can't have fun.
I'm just not sure I'm ready to date right now. UGH!
I also forgot about the singer that someone wants to set me up with. This is ridiculous.
And all I'm thinking about is one man that I don't even want to speak too.
Showing posts with label sick. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sick. Show all posts
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
Tuesday, November 6, 2007
You Give Me Fever
DB is sick with fever, croupy cough and all the good stuff, and like the good boy I'm teaching him to be he's decided to share with me.... just the fever. I'm prone to croup. Yes, I'm an adult, but for some strange reason I can still get croupy. My second year in Eretz Yisrael I had to go to the hospital it was so bad. I'm relieved that I only have the hot feeling on my eyelids right now and not the cough.
It looks like we'll be spending the tomorrow inside watching PBS and The Price Is Right on tv while on the sofa wrapped in a blanket. Don't forget the orange juice, tea and honey and popsicles.
It looks like we'll be spending the tomorrow inside watching PBS and The Price Is Right on tv while on the sofa wrapped in a blanket. Don't forget the orange juice, tea and honey and popsicles.
Sunday, July 29, 2007
B'Sha'a Tova (In Good Time, At The Right Time)
Wonderful News delivered on my brother's b-day no less. I'm going to be an aunt again... for the seventh time. It's been about two years since the last boy was born. They're all boys and I'm jealous. Not in the way that I wish I could take this joy from them and give it to me, but in the way that I want to have more children too.
I've been thinking about that lately, and whether or not I will actually have the guts to get pregnant one day even if I'm not married. Don't get me wrong. I want to get married (at least I do today), but if it doesn't happen I don't want to lose the chance to have more children while waiting for Mr. Right (let's be realistic, Mr. Almost-Right).
I had a miserable pregnancy with DB and yes, I would suffer through it all over again. First there was the fear of miscarriage. The doctor didn't want to call my first visits (for DB) pregnancy visits until we were able to see the heartbeat and my blood levels were up. It's because of the mis that I had.
The doctor was doing the first ultrasound on my first pregnancy (before DB) and there was an empty sac. He was put on the spot and felt so bad telling us. Then stbx got tears in his eyes and I had to comfort him and make the doctor feel more at ease. This was during the eleventh week. I think I was in denial and shock. He asked me if I wanted to wait until it happened naturally and I immediately replied that if it wasn't a baby I wanted it out of me. I didn't want to feel pregnant if I wasn't. That was just too hard. So it was scheduled to take place less than a week. I also had the choice of having it done in the hospital or his office. Since the office could be scheduled quicker that's what I chose.
I was fine for the first few weeks after and then it hit.... and hard. The babies, the children, the families all ripped at my heart. One of the things that I had always known about myself was that I was born to be a mom. I have this connection with children and babies, and everyone who knows me agrees. Maybe it's their innocence and unconditional love.
Anyway, the job I had made it even harder. I saw children and pregnant women every day usually every hour. The fact that no one knew made it even harder. Stbx could've cared less, "Get over it. It happened weeks ago." I didn't even try to explain it to him. Useless to do so, and I was starting to recognize that. I did tell one co-worker when it was just too much one day and someone (actually most of the customers) had asked me when I was finally going to have a child. I smiled and turned away with tears in my eyes. I had to leave for awhile and I came back with the three dots that shape a triangle that I get on my upper right cheek near my eye whenever I cry.
It was a release to finally let someone else know. Of course, after I had DB and was talking to friends of mine and other new moms in the community I discovered that almost all of them had had miscarriages and that half of them had a miscarriage in their first pregnancy. WHOA!!! If only the doctor would've told me or if there was even an article about it at the mikva. Because you don't discuss this with people when you're trying... then they know you're trying and ask you how it's going. I would've felt hundreds of times better if I knew this. To this day I am still finding out about people having miscarriages on their first and second tries. I'm also finding out that it hurts just as much even when you already have two children.
Then there was the weight gain and morning sickness. I wasn't vomiting so I gained ninety (yes, nine zero) lbs. The only things I could eat were white bread, potato chips, noodles, sour cream, bologna and potatoes-white potatoes for the first 4 1/2 months. I couldn't sleep or stand because of the nausea and the only way to stop it was to actually be chewing and swallowing. I had to go into a separate room if people wanted to eat anything other than those items.
I also had amniocentesis done, but no one told me that most women experience cramping after it. That was scary. Then there was some bleeding and I was hospitalized and had to take it easy after that. Finally after 24 hours of labor, three of which involved pushing without an epidural and while on pitocin (it makes the contractions so much harder) and trying every possible position to get that baby out of me. I asked for a knife because I was ready to cut him out myself then and there. Don't mess with a woman in delivery. I felt a contraction coming and ORDERED the anesthesiologist to hold my foot so I could push. He just looked at me until I YELLED at him to "HOLD MY FOOT!!!" Then he couldn't move fast enough.
Finally after the c-section the darlin' boy was born, albeit with his skull rubbed raw from where he had been trying to get past my tailbone. It stayed that way for a week until it finally scabbed over. Back labor isn't fun for anyone involved.
Anyway... I forgot what I was writing about... Oh! Wanting more kids... HA! Even after all that and a couple months of colic, I do... I really do want to have more children. I have so much love to give and share. I used to feel bad that DB didn't have a sibling to go through this horrible divorce with, but if he had who knows if I would've been able to help him as much and to discover his learning issues.
btw - DB is extremely bright and I don't want to just focus on his weaknesses like reading and writing. I want to also push his strengths... any type of reasoning, logic, spatial etc. Anyone have any ideas how to do this??? I'll probably have to get some more books, and do some more reading to figure out how to work on this.
I've been thinking about that lately, and whether or not I will actually have the guts to get pregnant one day even if I'm not married. Don't get me wrong. I want to get married (at least I do today), but if it doesn't happen I don't want to lose the chance to have more children while waiting for Mr. Right (let's be realistic, Mr. Almost-Right).
I had a miserable pregnancy with DB and yes, I would suffer through it all over again. First there was the fear of miscarriage. The doctor didn't want to call my first visits (for DB) pregnancy visits until we were able to see the heartbeat and my blood levels were up. It's because of the mis that I had.
The doctor was doing the first ultrasound on my first pregnancy (before DB) and there was an empty sac. He was put on the spot and felt so bad telling us. Then stbx got tears in his eyes and I had to comfort him and make the doctor feel more at ease. This was during the eleventh week. I think I was in denial and shock. He asked me if I wanted to wait until it happened naturally and I immediately replied that if it wasn't a baby I wanted it out of me. I didn't want to feel pregnant if I wasn't. That was just too hard. So it was scheduled to take place less than a week. I also had the choice of having it done in the hospital or his office. Since the office could be scheduled quicker that's what I chose.
I was fine for the first few weeks after and then it hit.... and hard. The babies, the children, the families all ripped at my heart. One of the things that I had always known about myself was that I was born to be a mom. I have this connection with children and babies, and everyone who knows me agrees. Maybe it's their innocence and unconditional love.
Anyway, the job I had made it even harder. I saw children and pregnant women every day usually every hour. The fact that no one knew made it even harder. Stbx could've cared less, "Get over it. It happened weeks ago." I didn't even try to explain it to him. Useless to do so, and I was starting to recognize that. I did tell one co-worker when it was just too much one day and someone (actually most of the customers) had asked me when I was finally going to have a child. I smiled and turned away with tears in my eyes. I had to leave for awhile and I came back with the three dots that shape a triangle that I get on my upper right cheek near my eye whenever I cry.
It was a release to finally let someone else know. Of course, after I had DB and was talking to friends of mine and other new moms in the community I discovered that almost all of them had had miscarriages and that half of them had a miscarriage in their first pregnancy. WHOA!!! If only the doctor would've told me or if there was even an article about it at the mikva. Because you don't discuss this with people when you're trying... then they know you're trying and ask you how it's going. I would've felt hundreds of times better if I knew this. To this day I am still finding out about people having miscarriages on their first and second tries. I'm also finding out that it hurts just as much even when you already have two children.
Then there was the weight gain and morning sickness. I wasn't vomiting so I gained ninety (yes, nine zero) lbs. The only things I could eat were white bread, potato chips, noodles, sour cream, bologna and potatoes-white potatoes for the first 4 1/2 months. I couldn't sleep or stand because of the nausea and the only way to stop it was to actually be chewing and swallowing. I had to go into a separate room if people wanted to eat anything other than those items.
I also had amniocentesis done, but no one told me that most women experience cramping after it. That was scary. Then there was some bleeding and I was hospitalized and had to take it easy after that. Finally after 24 hours of labor, three of which involved pushing without an epidural and while on pitocin (it makes the contractions so much harder) and trying every possible position to get that baby out of me. I asked for a knife because I was ready to cut him out myself then and there. Don't mess with a woman in delivery. I felt a contraction coming and ORDERED the anesthesiologist to hold my foot so I could push. He just looked at me until I YELLED at him to "HOLD MY FOOT!!!" Then he couldn't move fast enough.
Finally after the c-section the darlin' boy was born, albeit with his skull rubbed raw from where he had been trying to get past my tailbone. It stayed that way for a week until it finally scabbed over. Back labor isn't fun for anyone involved.
Anyway... I forgot what I was writing about... Oh! Wanting more kids... HA! Even after all that and a couple months of colic, I do... I really do want to have more children. I have so much love to give and share. I used to feel bad that DB didn't have a sibling to go through this horrible divorce with, but if he had who knows if I would've been able to help him as much and to discover his learning issues.
btw - DB is extremely bright and I don't want to just focus on his weaknesses like reading and writing. I want to also push his strengths... any type of reasoning, logic, spatial etc. Anyone have any ideas how to do this??? I'll probably have to get some more books, and do some more reading to figure out how to work on this.
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
Contagious Kids
Well, that's what I get for working with kids. Colds.... I've got a real doozy now. I like that word "doozy." It sounds funny... no, it doesn't remind me of doody although it did just now... DB's thought patterns are rubbing off on me. But it sounds like a little old lady... Nope, changed my mind it sounds like a little old man word. A picture of a porch outside a general store in the country with old men in plaid shirts on rocking chairs nodding their heads hello to whoever goes in to shop. Every so often they re-tell a story that's been told so many times they don't know which one of them it happened to anymore. And in that story preceded by the words, "Boy, that was a" is the word doozy, followed by the words "of a _________"
Doozy, Suzy, Kabloozy, woozy.......... ok, this head cold is really getting to me!!! Like my brain is off one another track. My eyes feel hot... actually it's my eyelids that feel hot.
Enough already, back to the post... what was I writing about anyway? Oh, the fact that I haven't even felt well enough to write the past couple of days and so much has been going on.
But first, I have noticed that after spending time with the children I've been caring for I am sick within 48 hours. DB is eight so Thank G-d, Boruch Hashem, Bli Ayin Horah, poo poo poo... we're past the time when there was maybe one day of reprieve and health before he came home from school with another runny nose, cough, pink eye, etc. I guess I just forgot that I could be susceptible to illness. Hey!!! I'm a mom. We don't get sick, or if we do it doesn't really matter if we are because we're still responsible for taking care of everyone and everything.
Enough about being sick already.... Not really kvetching just surprised to be sick again and it got me thinking. But what doesn't get me thinking?
Have to stop writing I need to go grab another box of tissues and a cup of tea.... btw why is doozy coming up on the spell check?
Doozy, Suzy, Kabloozy, woozy.......... ok, this head cold is really getting to me!!! Like my brain is off one another track. My eyes feel hot... actually it's my eyelids that feel hot.
Enough already, back to the post... what was I writing about anyway? Oh, the fact that I haven't even felt well enough to write the past couple of days and so much has been going on.
But first, I have noticed that after spending time with the children I've been caring for I am sick within 48 hours. DB is eight so Thank G-d, Boruch Hashem, Bli Ayin Horah, poo poo poo... we're past the time when there was maybe one day of reprieve and health before he came home from school with another runny nose, cough, pink eye, etc. I guess I just forgot that I could be susceptible to illness. Hey!!! I'm a mom. We don't get sick, or if we do it doesn't really matter if we are because we're still responsible for taking care of everyone and everything.
Enough about being sick already.... Not really kvetching just surprised to be sick again and it got me thinking. But what doesn't get me thinking?
Have to stop writing I need to go grab another box of tissues and a cup of tea.... btw why is doozy coming up on the spell check?
Monday, March 12, 2007
Just Very Busy
I'm a little annoyed I wrote this post before I left Kansas and completely lost it on the computer at my mom's. This is what I remembered.
I haven't written lately because I've been so busy. Here's a synopsis of what's been going on this past week....
DB and I went to Kansas for Purim late Sat. night and had a blast. We saw friends and family and I couldn't stop smiling and laughing... even without alcohol. Then drove back to Oz late Sunday night. Saw Charm Monday.... I was looking forward to his visit even though I was exhausted and had seen him on Friday. The next day was spent taking care of a beautiful 4 year old little boy with dark hair and a bowl cut. His brown eyes and dimple on his left cheek make him hard to resist. Even though he 's low on the autistic spectrum, I'm exhausted after spending a few hours with him. That probably comes from chasing him around in circles through the kitchen, dining room and living room while I'm pushing a toy lawnmower. Definitely a sight to see, but worth it when he falls on the floor giggling. When I ask him whether he thinks I like him a little or a lot. He responds with "A LOT!" and he's absolutely right.
That night I got very sick and couldn't function for a couple of days. I found out later that there was this neurovirus (don't know if that's the correct spelling) going around Jersey. I finally felt well enough to go back down to Kansas for Shabbos. I gave a little old man a ride to shul and then passed out before hearing kiddush. Probably still recuperating...
Today I visited this amazing, fantastic, caring school. It is most definitely the right place for DB. I just hope and pray that we will be able to relocate. The grounds are near a stable and the kids ride and groom the horses. There's a pond (frogs included) a zip line and rock wall to climb. It looks like so much fun. I want to go. AND they are taught all the basics and don't proceed to a new skill until the first one is completely mastered. All the therapies are included and the ratio is 1:5, but most of the time 1:2. Wow!
Tonight or rather last night since it's almost 6 a.m. I drove back to Oz again. I had to pack up the car, the cat, and the kid. I know I'm going to be feeling it later this week, but I really needed the caffeine and once I got in I couldn't go to sleep. I'm sure that within the next two weeks I will have little time to sleep. Hopefully some of that will be because I will spend some time with Charm. Can't get enough of the man......
I'll write more later... I have several posts that I am in the middle of and I want to respond to some that people have written. I might do that now or maybe I'll just workout. Who am I kidding?
I haven't written lately because I've been so busy. Here's a synopsis of what's been going on this past week....
DB and I went to Kansas for Purim late Sat. night and had a blast. We saw friends and family and I couldn't stop smiling and laughing... even without alcohol. Then drove back to Oz late Sunday night. Saw Charm Monday.... I was looking forward to his visit even though I was exhausted and had seen him on Friday. The next day was spent taking care of a beautiful 4 year old little boy with dark hair and a bowl cut. His brown eyes and dimple on his left cheek make him hard to resist. Even though he 's low on the autistic spectrum, I'm exhausted after spending a few hours with him. That probably comes from chasing him around in circles through the kitchen, dining room and living room while I'm pushing a toy lawnmower. Definitely a sight to see, but worth it when he falls on the floor giggling. When I ask him whether he thinks I like him a little or a lot. He responds with "A LOT!" and he's absolutely right.
That night I got very sick and couldn't function for a couple of days. I found out later that there was this neurovirus (don't know if that's the correct spelling) going around Jersey. I finally felt well enough to go back down to Kansas for Shabbos. I gave a little old man a ride to shul and then passed out before hearing kiddush. Probably still recuperating...
Today I visited this amazing, fantastic, caring school. It is most definitely the right place for DB. I just hope and pray that we will be able to relocate. The grounds are near a stable and the kids ride and groom the horses. There's a pond (frogs included) a zip line and rock wall to climb. It looks like so much fun. I want to go. AND they are taught all the basics and don't proceed to a new skill until the first one is completely mastered. All the therapies are included and the ratio is 1:5, but most of the time 1:2. Wow!
Tonight or rather last night since it's almost 6 a.m. I drove back to Oz again. I had to pack up the car, the cat, and the kid. I know I'm going to be feeling it later this week, but I really needed the caffeine and once I got in I couldn't go to sleep. I'm sure that within the next two weeks I will have little time to sleep. Hopefully some of that will be because I will spend some time with Charm. Can't get enough of the man......
I'll write more later... I have several posts that I am in the middle of and I want to respond to some that people have written. I might do that now or maybe I'll just workout. Who am I kidding?
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