The Name Of This Blog

Mak once asked me awhile back if I was ever going to change the name of my blog once I found Mr. Right. I still haven't come to a decision regarding that, but I have said yes to Mr. Rose.

He asked. I answered.

I love him.

There's so much more to say, and of course, I will. If I have the time, I'll continue to do so now. If not, you'll get it in bits and pieces as I plan for our wedding.

OMG!!!!!! I'm getting married to the most wonderful man I've ever met!!!!!!!

It Seems Like Forever

...that I haven't written. It's only been about three months. It also seems like it's forever since I met Mr. Rose. Y'all remember him. The man who was good to me, who is good to me... so good to me. I've never experienced in my life anything near what he has given me; in support, caring, understanding, patience, and most importantly love.

I feel safe and secure with him in so many ways. I trust him with my emotions and I also trust him to stick around. He is the first man that I've ever introduced to DB as someone I'm dating. Not only that I tell him I love him within DB's earshot, and he's seen me hug him.

Now that's a huge step. I can't begin to write how my life has changed since he's become a part of it. UGH!!! That sounds so, actually most of this post sounds so, so ummmm.... so mushy, so lovey dovey, so grossifyingly sweet. It's just got to stop.

OK, so let's talk about fighting. I've had a couple disagreements with him. I've also pulled away from him... very far away. And he's still hung around. He wouldn't let me run away from him, but he gave me the room I needed to come back. This man is unbelievable. OK, OK, I've started gushing again. Yes, it's ridiculous.

The funny thing is that I never would've picked him for me. I mean c'mon he's about 11 years older, he lives in a different city, and before I started dressing him... well, he just didn't care that much. Yes, he dressed neatly. And yes, he wore clean clothes, but he dressed plainly. You could tell that he hadn't really bought anything for himself in quite some time. So, his daughter and I had fun together and got him some shirts and ties, pants, cashmere sweaters (so yummy to cuddle up to when he's in them, and yes he's yummy to cuddle up to when he's not in them {take that as you will}) a nice pair of cashmere lined leather gloves for Shabbos, a cashmere scarf, and a new suede hat.

He looks good!!!! And he also smells good. I told him how I like cologne on a man, and he went out to get some. Then he wrote a little screenplay about his search for the right scent. He's smart, witty, and knows what to say to me (in many different ways). He's the man! My man.
In case you can't tell, I've got it bad for him.

Oh! Forgot to tell you about the jewelry he gave me for my b-day, how my family loves him, how he sticks up for me, and how comfortable DB is around him.

Every time he reminds me of how long we've been dating (it was just our 4 month anniversary), we laugh because it seems like we've been together forever, even if it's such a short time and yet we look back and realize how far we have come.

Yes, he is the one who's been keeping track. I still get roses. He cleans my apartment and peels 10 lbs. of potatoes without a single complaint. HE DOES THE FREAKIN' DISHES!!! WOW!!! and believe me the man is not pussy whipped. He has a mind of his own and a strength that just attracts me to him like you wouldn't believe.

Don't really want to get into our sex life. OMG!!!! Can you believe that I'm writing that?!?? Me, Miss My Bed Is An Open Book. But it's personal. Whoa!!! I get freaked out sometimes in this relationship. I can't believe the things I now say and do. Anyway, I'll write more later. just wanted to update and let some of you know what's going on in my life. Plus I might want to one day look back and read this with him and laugh and laugh!

Just Listen

When I talk to my friends about things that are going on in my life I don't expect answers or solutions. In fact, I don't usually appreciate them. I just need to talk. I usually know exactly what's going on and what needs to be done. This is my life after all. I just need to vent or hear my thoughts out loud.

I try my best to do this for my friends too. It used to be much more difficult. I hurt when the people I care about hurt, and I used to want to solve everything. I find that listening is appreciated more, and if they really need advice my friends will ask for it.

Even if I share similar characteristics to you, what you might find a workable solution may not necessarily apply to me. I am my own person and make my own choices so it bothers me if someone feels that they are responsible for giving me "bad advice" and what occurs afterwards. In no uncertain terms, is that true. For one thing, if you give me advice it doesn't necessarily mean that I'm taking it. For another, by apologizing for the advice you gave, it is as if you are assuming direct responsibility for my actions.

I love my friends, but I resent when they do that. If I choose to do something, it may not be because of your advice even if you did mentioned it.

I know I'm a little bit touchy about this. It might come from the fact that I lived under someone's control for quite some time and had to work very hard to break free of it.

Thanks for listening.

The Good Man

I've been thinking about Mr. Right, and Mr. Right Now for awhile and realized that what I'm really looking for is a "Good Man."

When a guy impresses me to such an extent I usually call him "a good guy" It's one of the highest compliments I can give. I used to think that I was looking for that "good guy", but now I realize that it's a man I want. A Good Man.

So I started to try to figure out what does that really mean to me. Is it someone who helps an old lady across the street, who volunteers at a soup kitchen in his spare time, or is it someone who donates a large portion of his money to tzedaka?

Although all of those things are highly commendable, I realized that it wasn't what made someone a "Good Man"...at least not to me.


It's the man who gets out of bed every morning and goes to work, but doesn't forget to kiss his kids and wish them good luck on their test that day. It's the man who sheepishly forgets the anniversary, but thanks his wife when he walks in to a clean home and dinner on the table. It's the man who gets annoyed when someone cuts him off in traffic, but will walk away from or even try to break up a fight. He's an ordinary man, but inside of him there is goodness, patience, and thankfulness that although his life is ordinary it's still special to him. He understands that it's the little things, a look, touch, note, or a joke that can be shared between us.

This "Good Man" is a grown up, but that does not preclude him from acting like a child and getting down on the floor and wrestling with the kids, dog, and cat (all at the same time). This "Good Man" loves life and what he has of it. He wants to give to his family things that he believes they will enjoy and his time also.

The most important part of this description is the fact that he is a man and recognizes I'm a woman. I've probably alienated a few of you out there with that statement, but I believe there is a difference and I'm glad for it to be recognized. And yes, I'm aware that I wrote above that he's thankful to have a clean home and dinner on the table, but that doesn't mean he won't make dinner too. It's just that I want to be at home with the kids so Mr. Mom is not what I'm looking for, but I know of men like that.

I respect them all the more because they are still "Men" even though they are many times viewed as less than by others of the same and opposite sex. Yes, this is my opinion, but I've recognized these feelings through other's treatment, condescension and ignoring of the father for the mother's take on a certain matter when he is the more knowledgeable one with regard to their children.

What am I really trying to say here while I ramble on and on? I guess I want a caring, loving individual comfortable in his own skin who is interested and willing to share his life, love and time with his family, and is grateful for the chance to be able to do so and deserves to be respected for his efforts the same way that he respects the many different people he encounters daily.

Hey!!!! Don't forget he's got to be good in bed too. C'mon, you really didn't think that I would write a post about men and not bring up sex? Did you????


btw-Since I haven't found him yet, I'm sure that there will be updates to this post in the future