DB's List

At brunch today we went around the room and everyone mentioned what they loved the best about their mom. DB was second and he brought tears to my eyes. "I love my mom 'cause she helps me with homework." That's true. We sit together sometimes for hours working.

"I also love my mom because she got me Cutie." That's his cat. Since DB doesn't have any brothers or sisters to commiserate with when mom has been "unfair", I made sure he had a pet to tell all his troubles too. She's one of his best friends in the world.

The last thing DB said was what surprised me and touched me, "I love my mom because she finds the bright side to things." Wow! I felt so proud of my son for recognizing this trait and appreciating it. The other adults gave me looks over his head as if to say you have a very special boy. He hasn't even made it into double digits, but his confidence and ability to express himself is something I would expect of a much older child.

We have a lot of craziness in our lives, and I try to keep things easy and simple for DB. Sometimes it's just not possible, and that's when I try to find something good in what's going on. In some instances, there's just no way to do this, and it would also be denying the awfulness of what's taking place. But whenever I can I try to find something that DB and I can smile and laugh over.

The weird thing about this is that I admire this trait in DB, and I've told him so. I guess I didn't realize that I was the one he was learning it from.

It's In

The forensic report that is. And custody stays the same. I have full custody, legal and physical. The forensic didn't really have anything bad to say about me. I'm going to read it tomorrow at my attorney's. But this is

ABSOLUTELY, FREAKIN',


UNBELIEVABLYAMAZING!!!!!!!!


YAY!!!!! HOORAY!!! WOO HOO!!!!


I want to shout it from the rooftops. I don't have to worry about the way I parent DB anymore. Thank you, thank you, Hashem. If I had everyone's phone numbers I would have called all you guys and told you this great news.

Of course, it doesn't mean that anything about relocation is resolved, but it's one less thing for me to worry about. And it does help my case. The trial is still up in the air and it looks like I might be stuck in Oz for at least another six months, possibly a year but still.....

I want to hug and kiss everyone I see. I've been smiling and talking to strangers the whole day. Not about the case... just about whatever. I've been helping moms with babies and shopping carts, offering suggestions about books for children, offering cold drinks to the postman and doorman, letting old people cross the road and smiling and waving back to them, talking to garbage men, cashiers and anyone else I come in contact with. Don't stand too close I might start talking to you next. Some of these people initiated conversations with me, but that was only after I was smiling at them.

Hashem has created a beautiful world. I can finally care for DB without looking over my shoulder. Free at last. Free at last. Thank G-d Almighty I'm free at last!