Thursday, March 27, 2008

Happy Girl

How can you be angry at someone who knows you better than you know yourself? At someone you don't even want to be angry with? At someone who knows you just want to pick a fight and don't really want to hurt them?

I was upset when he called. He knew from the second he heard my voice that something was wrong, but he didn't push and ask me about it. I was trying hard not to be argumentative, but then he asked me if I wanted to fight. It appears that I can't hide things from him, not that I really want to or maybe I do.

Something he said made me smile and he knew it would. The next thing I knew there were tears in my eyes and he offered me his shoulder to cry on. That did it and I felt the wet drops trace a hot path down my cheeks. My voice didn't catch in my throat and I wasn't sniffling so there was no way for him to know I was crying. His soft words soothed and relaxed me as if he were holding me in his arms.

Usually when I'm that distressed the tears will go on for quite some time, but as he tells me he's "magic." Never have I felt better in such a short amount of time and with less tears. The next thing I know I'm giggling again.


I'm not upset when he calls, and then he says just the words that he knows will bug me. It's done on purpose to get a rise out of me, and it works of course. He's got his fingers on what buttons to push.

Then he chuckles, and he is most definitely aware that this only infuriates me more. Two seconds later he tells me something that has me cracking up despite myself. This makes him laugh even harder knowing that I'm trying my best to stay irritated with him and that I'm losing the battle. My giggles inform him that he has won again.

Either way it's hard to stay angry at a man who makes me happy... a very happy girl.


Anonymous said...


come running said...

Stooooooop it!!!

Mr. Clean said...

Whoa - I couldn't get over how over and over the same thing kept repeating itself in this video. I mean, I couldn't pay attention to the lyrics it was so distracting. We must have seen it about 20 times!

No, not the sucking-face. This genetically gifted guy still had a perfect hairline at age 40! Did you see that?

To die for...

come running said...

Mr. Clean,
Didn't really notice the hair. Definitely noticed the kissing!!

Mr. Clean said...

It's elementary, my dear Watson, and can be stated as:

"Mr Clean's Androgenetic alopecia / philematological theory of inversity".

It basically comes down to this: Mr. Clean's not "gettin' any". Take it from me - I know. I'm Mr. Clean.

The rule is this: "the measure of receding hairlines is inversely related to the quantity of kissing. Now, it could be the one kiss every eon is really good and long, but it's the quantity we're talking about here, as evidenced by the Youtube video, and Mr. Clean is not called Mr. Memory.

I mean, if he had a wench to clean his kitchen, you think he'd have to clean it himself? It's a matter of simple deductive logic, CR. Mr. Clean is simply trying to make the best of a bad situation by marketing his cleaning products, the very same ones he uses because he doesn't want to put any elbow grease or effort into the matter. It's not like he's going to sell shampoos, ya know.

It comes down to this...If you noticed the kissing and not the hairline, you've probably got hair not just on your head, but also on your palms and footpads. Now take a look - am I right, or what? :-)

Two more proofs:

1) You'll notice in the video that the apartment they kiss in is always neat. There's no way a guy can keep it that neat. Do you see a single pizza box or beer can? - the woman must be doing the cleaning. Measure his hairline and voila, it all becomes crystal clear.

2) Whenever you see a balding guy being kissed by a hot woman on Youtube, it's his sister or mother.

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I have placed the evidence before you. May G-d have mercy, and the moral of the story is, ladies, if you don't want to clean your own apartment, have whatever relationships you want but keep a bald man in the house.

Anonymous said...


come running said...

you make me smile

Anonymous said...

Watch the door, hate for you to bump your head.

come running said...

I only bump my head in bed, or falling out of it. Or maybe when I leave a kitchen cabinet open, the freezer door open, or getting into the car or getting out of the car...

OK, fine! I'll watch my head.

Anonymous said...

rugburn, rugburn,

come running said...

Mr. Clean,
Bald men can be very, very sexy... Sean Connery, Patrick Stewart

Will you kiss it and make it better?

Anonymous said...

lick it

Mr. Clean said...

Right. Let's play a little imagination game, my friend...

Ok, no close your eyes. Yes, keep them closed really really tight.

Now, breath deeply. Deeply. Imagine the following men, all of them bald as a barber pole, undressing in front of you.

*Dom Delouise,
*Don Rickles,
*Sonny Bono,
*Danny DeVito
*Dwight D. Eisenhower

Now don't run away screaming yet - we're not finished....

I'll tell you what you see - you imagine them in white wife-beaters with garters on their calve-height black socks and polka dotted boxer shorts!!!! LOL! That's NOT what you saw with Patrick "Earl Grey" Stewart and Sean "James, James Bond" Connery, was it? :-)

Makes ya wanna clean the apartment, doesn't it?

Mr. Clean said...

Here's an article for your entertainment, CR.

On a similar note, yesterday I took my oldest son for a haircut. Alas, he's still quite ablessed with hirsute copiousness. Basically, lawn mowers might have a better chance than scissors with his mop.

We didn't make an appointment so we looked around to see who was last. Normally, that's not hard to do. You basically ask. "Who's last?" Surveying the room, we saw a father was there with his two children. The little boy was already on the "chair", and the little girl was about to get on.

The father was as bald as can be. Now, how can I ask HIM if he's last? I looked at my son, and he at me, and we started to smile, wondering simultaneously what the barber could possibly do for him or with him. Hmm. There's Turtle Wax, perhaps - try to buff that beanie into a fine mirror finish.

So, of course we didn't ask - we just assumed it'd work it's way out - we'd see if he gets up and sits in the chair or not. We prepared ourselves for any eventuality, but I think we'd have to have stepped out if he pulled out the power buffer.

Ah, the moments we share with our sons as we whistle passed the graveyard.

Mr. Clean said...

Ooops forgot the link