Cosmo's Case of Cuteness

OK, I admit it. Sometimes I read Cosmopolitan, and I'll be honest it's not just for the fashion advice. In case you've never deigned to buy a Cosmo magazine and have been too embarrassed to be caught reading one in the doctor's office.... the magazine discusses sex an awful lot. By awful, I am referring to the way the articles about sex are written. The information supplied might be useful but the alliteration can drive you to tears.... because you're laughing so hard.

The following was written with actual phrases from the magazine. I couldn't resist.

Cosmo commandments and steamy suggestions for your marathon man, the boss of the booty session. Carve out carnal time and shred the sheets with tantalizing teasing touches, romance rituals, and mind blowing moves. Show him your lusty limits using toe curling techniques, primal passion, and erotic electricity during a randy roll in the pleasure palace.

btw: you should see the euphemisms Cosmo use for body parts